YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
the day after is always just damage control
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
