he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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