So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
why do cheetos always look like penises
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
