he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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