butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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