I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
