kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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