frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize