ugly people sure do ruin things
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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