Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
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