help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Randomize
