it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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