is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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