its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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