don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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