Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Your cock deserves a montage
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I just want to make out with him forever
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
