can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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