I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
