brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
