She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize