You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
