I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
