Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
