I CAN MOONWALK!
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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