I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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