I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
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