Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize
