she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
