apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
