Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize