pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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