I don't think brook has ever known best
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
