YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
My dick has a subreddit
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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