Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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