her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
Randomize
