what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
