You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
