so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
you never un-have a 4some
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
