absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize