I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
only you would photoshop your dick
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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