I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
Randomize
