Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
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