How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
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