I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
