you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
