I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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