I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
Randomize
