Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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