I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize
