At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Randomize
