so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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